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“How Grandmaster Helped me to find my way back to my Father”

Testimonial By a Humbled Student

wallpaper-father-and-son-at-beach

I already knew that mentoring with Kuk Sa Nim would have been a deep experience, but the ability of the Grandmaster to know where to focus his attention and transmit his words really surprised me.

The knowledge, the depth, the experience of this man are prodigious. The many subjects we encountered in our conversation went from quantum physics to philosophy, with absolute simplicity. I only had to bring out the reason of my interior resentment, that is the absence of a relationship with my father, whom was never a father, to obtain from him a detailed analysis and the direction to overtake rage and fears, and to free myself from my own conditioning.

I only had to bring out the reason of my interior resentment, that is the absence of a relationship with my father, whom was never a father, to obtain from him a detailed analysis and the direction to overtake rage and fears, and to free myself from my own conditioning.

I felt necessary to let the GrandMaster know of the burden I had been carrying for many years. A real setback in my life: the total lack of any relationship with my father. That was a decision I had to make fifteen years earlier, after having realized throughout the previous years that he did not care about me at all. He did not want any fruitful communication with me; there had never been any exchange of love or transmission of life experience or know-how in the manner of a father-to-son relationship. I had tried many times to speak to him and draw his attention on me, but was never successful. I had also tried to write him a letter, the most important letter of my life, in which I made a point about us, explaining his typical behaviors and again tried to tell him of his faults. When he received the letter, he just sent it back with the postman…

I was left with no choice but to quit on my father, in order to protect me and leave him to the life he wanted, without me.

The Grandmaster came directly to the point, his words cutting on my conscience like a sharp sword: I had to forgive my father; go to him and tell him I loved him. I also had to do it quickly, being my father 76 years old: in case of any troubles with his health, shouldn’t I succeed in letting him know in due time, a permanent shadow on my soul would have crippled me for the rest of my life.

I tried to explain how hard that task was after so many years, but I didn’t need to: He knew it already. He said that a warrior must always be ready to take on heavy duties without never stepping backwards. He ordered me to do it, so that I should have done it even if I hadn’t agreed. He said that I had to do it not because my father deserved it, but because I deserved to be set free from my burden, from my self-imposed anguish.

At the end of our time together, I was definitely much shaken by His words and on the verge of crying. He came and gave me a warm hug and in that very moment I somehow felt his strength passing on to me. I knew He was right!

At the end of our time together, I was definitely much shaken by His words and on the verge of crying. He came and gave me a warm hug and in that very moment I somehow felt his strength passing on to me. I knew He was right!

We have to realize the huge privilege of being a part of the Hwa Rang Do Family: the Grand Master, such as all of the instructors, are following our growth personally, and they are interested in making sure that each one of us express the best that we can be and become a better man, a better warrior. “Empowering the world, one person at a time!”

Grandmaster Taejoon Lee gave me the hardest assignment of my life. He wants me to do it quickly, and then he wants to be informed of the developments. No chatters, no excuses, no blame, I just have to get busy and act. I’m not saying that I’ll be able to do it tomorrow, but I need to let Grandmaster Lee’s words and reflections change me from the inside and break down the thick walls that I felt I was forced to build in these many years. However, I’m sure of one thing: I know I’ll do it, I must.

He’s right: nothing in the world is more powerful than “Love”, and if we have even one single hope in one billion to make someone think and maybe change, we can only do it relying on that “Love” that we all have within us. All we need is the strength to express it.

He’s right: nothing in the world is more powerful than “Love”, and if we have even one single hope in one billion to make someone think and maybe change, we can only do it relying on that “Love” that we all have within us. All we need is the strength to express it.

“In almost fifty years I learnt more than four thousands way to hurt someone, but true greatness is in not using them and believing in Love”. I have no other words, but immense admiration and deep gratitude, to define our Grandmaster. I’ll try to be worthy of his teachings and to transform the great inspiration I received from him into reality.

Thank you and Hwarang forever!

My update:

It took me a few days to think over Grandmaster’s words and I was ready to accomplish my task, the hardest ever in my life, but still the most necessary.

I waited for the right time in which I could find my father at home, and I advised the Grandmaster that the following Sunday I would go and meet him. Kuk Sa Nim told me to go there and speak freely with no expectations whatsoever, in order not to be let down in case of possible negative reactions. He told me to let my words come right from my heart.

I felt very confident because of this wonderful direct communication with my Grandmaster and all the strength he was able to pass on to me!

The day came and I went to meet my father. He appeared to be in full possession of his intellectual capabilities but did not recognize me for at least half a minute.. for sure, by showing up before him I had put him way outside his comfort zone..!

I greeted him and told him I was at the end of a path and I just wanted to let him know I loved him.

He replied he had been waiting for that all these many years..

A thought came across my mind, that he would have waited until death if I hadn’t decided to come over and meet him. As far as I could remember, he always preferred deciding not to decide… Then, I remembered Grandmaster’s words to love with no expectations and to stay in the positive. So, I quickly I let go of that negative thought and focused on dwelling in the positive.

We then spoke for about 10 minutes. He asked me of my work and I asked him of his retirement. We exchanged our cellphone numbers and everything let me think we would be in touch again soon.

I had succeeded in forgiving him and started a new chapter of a father & son relationship, which I have longed for all of my life. And, finally it’ll have a chance to be good since I promised myself that I won’t bring up anything of our past and his faults – never, ever again.

I had succeeded in forgiving him and started a new chapter of a father & son relationship, which I have longed for all of my life. And, finally it’ll have a chance to be good since I promised myself that I won’t bring up anything of our past and his faults – never, ever again.

All in all, that is the essence of forgiveness. You do not forget (you never could!), you just go through it and expand.

I left him with some time to fully understand the reasons of my visit and after one week my father called me on the phone to invite me for lunch at his place. He would introduce me to the woman he lives with and to her family.

We spoke for more than twenty minutes; he was friendly and I got along well. I can now say that all conditions for the beginning of a new and finally fruitful communication are set.

I entirely owe this victory to the words and wisdom of Grandmaster Taejoon Lee. He taught me that with the necessary humility and determination and most of all with a kind, compassionate heart every goal can be achieved. Never retreat!

Thank You, Sir.
Hwarang forever and everywhere!

Yours faithfully,

One Response to ““How Grandmaster Helped me to find my way back to my Father””

  1. taejoonlee says:

    It was my absolute pleasure and I am so happy for you. Please remember that with love, giving is receiving. And, you don’t need to thank me, thank God!

    Hwarang forever with love and God bless you,

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